Been thinking about the Proverbs 31 woman (part 4)

“Work willingly with our hands” Proverbs 31:13

This particular part of the Provers 31 woman seems to go hand-in-hand with another:

“Provide for our family” Proverbs 31:21

I can’t say I’ve always had a very good work ethic – in fact, I would ditch work now if I didn’t have two kids to take care of.  I liked being at home with my kids, doing whatever pleased me and them.  Even still, I appreciate the work I do have, and take pride in being (usually) independent.  Unfortunately, the money I make at my mediocre job isn’t paying my bills as quickly/easily as I’d like it to so, recently, I made the difficult decision to begin looking for a second job.  It’s times like these that I wish there was a second income from a husband.

I applied at a local retail store I worked at from 2004-05 when I had to find work very quickly after my husband lost all of our income.  They were willing to hire me on, but the work is extremely tiring and, after a lot of tossing and turning at night in bed, I decided to look elsewhere.  Several of my family members work for a locally-owned restaurant, and I decided to use those connections to get a hostessing job there.  Fortunately, this job should be relatively painless, and if I can find a better paying number one job (I’ve been looking for what seems like ages now) I’ll quit the second job.  I don’t want to do this, but I need to – for now.

Imagine that – the girl who hates to work is going to be working TWO jobs now!  I know, I can hardly believe it myself.

Been thinking about the Proverbs 31 woman (part 3)

“Create beauty in our lives and homes” Proverbs 31:22

I’m in a housekeeping funk. I have used FlyLady’s “routine” before, and have come away with a lot of good, basic ideas I can use for my family. I did try to do the emails, but they were getting out of hand for me and so I’ve got a household notebook now that I’m trying to “build” with routines that I can refer to until I get them down pat.

What I am finding in myself is a situation very similar to what Sheya describes: working a full time job with small children makes it very easy to come home absolutely exhausted and say, “I’m too tired to do (this or that)…” And, of course, there is the excuse that I’m a single mom and it’s sooooo tiring driving to work and school and keep up on my housework alllllll by myselllllllf. (Can you hear the whining in my voice?) My mom told me last night that if I can’t have the President over, my house isn’t clean enough. This frustrated me, because I grew up in a house with six children and two parents, and our house was NEVER that clean.

Do you think it is different when you have two children as opposed to six? or does it depend on the attitude of the parent and what he/she instills in him/herself and the rest of the family? Maybe that’s the funk I’m in… maybe my attitude needs an adjustment…

Attitude problem or not, I believe it’s true that how you keep your house is how you keep your life. I am constantly forgetting something, or losing something, thus creating more stress in my life than is otherwise necessary… so it is my goal for 2008 that I put more effort into creating consistant beauty in our life and home.

Been thinking about the Proverbs 31 woman (part 2)

“Prepare healthy food for our household” Proverbs 31:15

One of my downfalls as a parent is my lack of enthusiasm for cooking when I arrive home after a long day at work and driving to and from the kids’ schools. I’d much rather pick up something from the local fast-food joint and relax for the rest of the evening. Unfortunately, I know I am not helping myself or my kids stay on track as far as nutrition is concerned; also, fast-food “seems” cheap, but in the end it adds up.

I have but two questions at this time:

How can one eat well on a strict (read: small) budget?
What small steps can I take now that will lead me in the right direction?

Been thinking about the Proverbs 31 woman (part 1)

I’ve recently become somewhat fascinated with Proverbs 31, and have thought, “Could I ever be that woman?” Re-reading my post regarding being a virtuous woman, I am forced to look at how I am living my life. I’ll take it a bit at a time – let’s review, shall we?

“Train our children in the ways of the Lord” Proverbs 22:6

When my son was born, maybe even in the months before he was born, I decided to raise my child as a Christian – a Roman Catholic. I hadn’t been to church in ages, and I was what “they” call a “cafeteria Catholic”… but it was important to me that my child know God and I was going to use this as an opportunity for myself, as well, to get to know God and what He was “about”. What I found was, after baptizing my son in the Catholic church, I still really didn’t know God, and I wasn’t even close to knowing. I still had so many questions that weren’t answered. I ended up not participating in the church I grew up in, and “fell away” for a couple of years, until my daughter was born. I went through the same convictions of raising my child to know God… and I failed miserably at following through. According to the Catholic faith, children are to be baptized as babies – my daughter is four years old now, and has never been baptized.

Two years after my daughter was born, my life became increasingly difficult with a spouse who was mentally ill and refused treatment and counseling, and we ended up seperating. It was going to be a long ride through Hell, really, and I’m just now learning how to ease away from all the backdraft.

I ended up checking out a local church that I knew some family friends had been attending for many years, and found out a good friend of mine from school was attending, as well. I contacted my friend, and decided I would come check out a service soon. I LOVED IT!! I didn’t know what a Nazarene was, but I knew I loved the fellowship and the message; my kids were able to experience the joy of learning about God and Jesus during their time in the children’s ministry while I was in the “big church”. It made me feel good that I was doing something right for them and for me – for our family.

I was so on fire, I (almost immediately) joined the church choir, and had my kids going to the children’s ministry activity Wednesday nights. I considered becoming a member, and inquired about the next membership class, which I attended just a month or two after I started attending the church. During and after the class, I realized that it was exactly what I was looking for. There was only one thing I didn’t understand (quite honestly, I think I will be spending some quality time with my pastor and other trusted friends over the next segment of my life trying to understand/rehash this particular question, anyway), but everything else was like a whole new world to me that I wasn’t able to see as a member of a Catholic church! It was like a burden had been lifted. It was a good day for me, and it was a good start at being a godly family.

Unfortunately, all this will have been in vain if I do not pull myself together. I have such a long way to go with my life if I want to consider myself a Proverbs 31 woman, and not praising the Lord with everything I do is not going to get me there… in my eyes, or in His. I just feel so tainted at times, maybe I’m too far gone. No, I don’t believe that is the case, I don’t believe anyone can be that far gone, but it seems like such a daunting journey for me… can a woman have all the qualities of the woman described in Proverbs 31 even if she has never been that way? I want to be a fine example for my children (most especially for my daughter), I just don’t know where to begin.

Being a virtuous woman

Being a virtuous woman – a woman of great worth and beauty – is about being a well rounded character. It is our goal as virtuous women in training to learn to:

- “be keepers at home” Titus 2:5
- “practice hospitality” 1 Peter 4:9
- “stretch out our hands to the needy” Proverbs 31:20
- “train our children in the ways of the Lord” Proverbs 22:6
- “love our husband all the days of his life” Proverbs 31:12
- “not deny our husbands intimacy” 1 Cor 7:5
- “respect our husbands as the head of the home” 1 Peter 3:1
- spend money wisely and “know our merchandise is good” Proverbs 31:18
- “walk in fear of the Lord” Proverbs 31:30
- “work willingly with our hands” Proverbs 31:13
- and “without murmuring” Philippians 2:14
- “speak with kindness to everyone” Proverbs 31:26
- “prepare healthy food for our household” Proverbs 31:15
- because our “bodies are like the temple of God” 1 Cor 6:19
- “create beauty in our lives and homes” Proverbs 31:22
- “provide for our family” Proverbs 31:21
- “keep His commandments” John 14:15
- wake up each morning with “a song in our heart” Psalm 118:24

Read more here.